Bad Day? Take a Mulligan
Monday, February 22, 2010 at 11:21AM By Lynn Selich
We all have one of “those” days now and then. Days when Murphy’s Law seems to be on overdrive, acid or steroids. Surreal and frustrating, I was having a day like that last Thursday, at least for a little while.
The day started out relatively well. I made it through my usual workout, a few hours at the computer, and looked forward to having my raggedy roots colored by a new hipster hairstylist that a friend had highly recommended.
So, off I went for my appointment, secure in the knowledge that in a few mere hours, my gray hairs would magically disappear and I’d be all dolled up in time to celebrate my husband’s birthday (more on that shortly), Friday’s Mayor’s Dinner and our departure for a relaxing weekend in the desert.
My mood remained light until the new stylist kept me waiting an hour and 20 minutes, never to show. I reluctantly agreed to be rescheduled with him again at three p.m. Yet, 3 o'clock came and went and the guy was nowhere to be found!
I went back home, this time miffed, and began calling around to see if I could get another hair appointment on short notice without much luck, but with a few chuckles on the other end of the phone. Grrrr…. I growled – what a waste of time!
Then in a juxtaposition of mood and media, I made the colossal mistake of turning on the TV in my office to find practically every channel locked on the image of a robotic Tiger Woods giving a press conference apologizing for his transgressions. The whole scene was stiff, forced and just a tad insincere.
I thought it couldn’t get much worse until I switched the channel and landed on “the other” press conference: that featuring the supercilious Gloria Allred and her sad-sap, former-Tiger-mistress-now-out-of-work-porn-star client who had the audacity to pronounce to the world she “just wants an apology from Tiger.” Wow. Seriously?! This gal didn’t need a lawyer she needed a good kick in the rear and a reality check. She needed to be the one apologizing! Sadly, she’s not only been screwed by Tiger, she’s being publicly used by another shameless opportunist in the form of her “advocate” Allred.
No one is perfect, I realize that. To err is human – but this sorrowful situation takes the saying to a whole new level. There are so many facets of this top news story that defy reason it’s difficult for me to get my arms around all the issues this one encompasses.
And don’t ask me why, as I watched the sorrowful spectacle, it shoved my mood into something short of road rage. I will try to boil it down to a few issues that top my list.
First, for those of us who married with monogamy on the mind, these folks represent the antithesis of the type of relationship most decent married women (and men) everywhere – especially anyone married to a public figure – strive to maintain. Their behavior flies in the face of everything we enter into marriage for in the first place. Famous or not, the results are the same when people cheat behind their spouse’s back thinking they are going to get away with it. In the long run, everyone loses.
Second, not to sound like a Dr. Laura zealot, when children are involved, we all have a responsibility to do what is in their best interest no matter how titillating any opportunity may be. Period. Whether it’s keeping them away from fast food, fast women or fast cars, it’s an obligation, not an option. That means keeping yourself away from them too – if it results in anything that could affect their well-being.
Life these days is tough enough without this kind of baseline behavior. It’s bad enough that Tiger repeatedly cheated and we have to keep hearing about it, but to have Allred espousing that her client is a victim is more than I can stomach. Is 15 minutes of fame really worth the devastation left in its path? I just find it enraging that so many people in this story chose to publicly air so much dirty laundry without regard to the mind-blowingly, low-brow messages they are sending, or for the people behind the scenes who are hurting and humiliated.
It sends a chill down the spine of any of us hoping to God it never happens to us.
Besides being amazed at their chutzpah, I’ll give ‘em this: at the end of the day, these women are all in a long line of 15-minute-forgetables who mistakenly think their actions make them special, that they are champions of some ‘cause.’ The fact is all they prove is sometimes the old cliché is wrong. It’s not always men that are pigs.
My foul mood finally gave way when I moved on from the refuse on the boob toob, and was able to find an excellent stylist who luckily had a cancellation on Friday morning and did a beautiful job transforming my hair from drab to dreamy.
Our plans to celebrate my dear husband’s birthday went swimmingly, and our decision to try the prix fixe dinner menu offered at The Coliseum at Pelican Hill was a big-time winner. We were dually impressed with both the delicious and reasonably priced meal, and the attentive (but not smothering) service from the friendly, professional staff.
As the sun set and we were enjoying one of the most breathtaking views in Southern California, overlooking a world-class golf course, I reflected on the day’s happenings and decided it came down to something we all need now and then.
Sometimes you just need to take a deep breath, and take a Mulligan.
Lynn Selich resides in Newport Beach. Her weekly column runs every Monday. She can be reached at lynnselich@roadrunner.com.
Reader Comments (1)
Does anyone edit this stuff? This segment, "Sadly, she’s not only been screwed by Tiger, she’s being publicly used by another shameless opportunist in the form of her “advocate” Allred.", seems more than a little coarse, especially coming from the spouse of a city official.